Creative Procrastination

Photo: Marina Marison

…. Is the reason I haven’t written anything here since April.
That, and a whole lot of life things that get in the way, but honestly no excuses!
Procrastinating is something we all do (to a certain extent), but it’s easier for some than for others to allow ourselves to that point where one just wants to scream at oneself; “STOP!! You have more important stuff to do, why are you watching YouTube and doing cross stitching?!”
Well my friends, that is the question to be answered.

Have you heard of Myers Briggs personality types?
Do the test here: www.16personalities.com
It’s a widely used personality test that determines your core cognitive functions (very popular in America), and how you will act according to those functions. Of course under stress one can shift to ones “shadow functions”, because the brain discovers that the way you’re doing things now is not working, so everything just flips and you can seem like a totally different person.
Anyway, according to this test I am a so called ENFP, and in basically all descriptions of this personality, it will be written that we procrastinate. A lot. Or do things in the last minute. Which has been absolutely true for all of my life (I’m not late anymore in the past 3 years though, I’ve matured! Now I still do some things last minute but I do great!).
So blaming things on ones personality type is a great way to win some time, until you get to the point where you actually DESIRE to write that blog post, and this is what comes out.
 
(...I seriously just went on Facebook for 2 minutes before realizing I should probably finish writing…)
 
Doing things at the last minute always work wonders for me! At least if I only have a few things to do. If my schedule is full, then I’ll do stuff immediately.
I feel the pressure, the excitement and adrenaline of upcoming event, and the creativity just starts flowing!!
But when there’s few things to do and no strict deadlines, things get much harder.
Some people need boundaries…
There are many factors to why people procrastinate!

• Lack of focus
• Fear of failure
• Excessive perfectionism
• Just plain stupid habit that’s hard to get rid of
• It’s an identity
• Form of rebellion
• Harsh parents that cause inability to regulate ones feelings
• Fear of success (change)

And I’ve learned to handle myself quite well!

I have a calendar for the past 3 years, planning out and writing down my weekdays.
I have to-do lists (just wrote one now), and the satisfaction to checking off something off that list really keeps you going.
I prepare things on time a few hours or days before!
But for some reason, when it comes to writing blogs, I write down a bunch of topics, and then I just get distracted…
When I do get in the flow of writing, it’s easy, but getting there is quite hard.

Sidenote: One of the things I discovered works for me (but probably not for you) is to have 3 things I have to do, and when one becomes boring I jump to another one! And I alternate between those (sometimes forcing myself to start with the next thing instead of doing push-ups or something) so doing work never gets boring!
 
I guess I just seek the thrill and rush of completing something, and when it’s all for something that takes time, or detail, or regularity… it’s much harder.
Growing up constantly competing in sports, grades and other life skills gets in your head!

I tend to forget that with freelancing, it’s not only working on your craft and doing the fun stuff.
It’s also promoting oneself, creating new events, happenings, networking, sewing, doing taxes, socializing, and in a way, freelancing work never stops. Ever.
Only way to not work, is to hide away from everything and everyone.
How do we find the thrill in the work “in between” work, the maintenance that has to happen for life to truly happen?
 
Thankfully, I take myself seriously enough to never give up, no matter how much stuff there is to do, or responsibilities to care for, by myself. Working for myself, deciding everything myself, disciplining myself…
This is what I wanted, right ?
​
 
Love and… eh, I’ll finish the sentence later.

//A sleep deprived Gypsy Queen,
because it’s bright 22 hours a day in Sweden now.